Yes drunks can be belligerent. So maybe after a few beers, somebody punches somebody, big deal.
Mess with caffeine drinkers and it’s war. Case in point: America.
Our colonies’ rage at royal tyranny was a powder keg. What sparked these scrappy frontier folk to go semi-suicidal in challenging the greatest empire the world has ever known?
Tea.
The most famous tea party. Revolution! Caffeine drinkers ready to fight and die for it.
Whoo hoo! We won our David-Goliath war against the most powerful empire! …not so fast.
For the war of 1812 they cut off our tea again: 35,000 more dead, white house torched. Fool me twice, lesson learned. So we switched to coffee from South America.
To ensure the supply we passed the Monroe doctrine, just to make sure no sons-of-bitches from Europe or Asia or anywhere ever mess with any government in this hemisphere—or their coffee beans. We almost had nuclear war in the 1960’s during the Cuban Missile Crisis over this, so it’s enforced.
So they’re kept separate: coffee during the day, alcohol at night… ‘cause if a coffee gets smacked out of someone’s hand? Things aren’t gonna end well.
